2024: Great expectation and our mental health | The Guardian Nigeria News – Nigeria and World News — Opinion … – Guardian Nigeria
Another year is dawning! Dear Father, let it be, in working or in waiting, another year with thee; another year of progress, another year of praise, another year of proving thy presence all the days… another year of trusting, of quiet, happy rest.
These are lines from the first and second stanzas of a popular hymn, “Another Year is dawning.” The lyrics to this hymn was written by Frances Ridley Havergal (1836-1879), a British poet and hymn writer who died at the age of 42 years. She wrote hundreds of hymns and also wrote the popular hymn, “Take my life and let it be, consecrated Lord to thee.”
The text to “Another year is dawning” was written by Frances on the greeting cards she sent to her friends in 1874. Although the hymn was composed 187 years ago, it has been set to different tunes by different composers. Such is the resonance of the words in this hymn with everyone in the twelfth month of every year.
In Nigeria, we have our own Mrs. DA Fasoyin leading the CAC Good Women Choir, Ibadan in the popular end of year song, Odun l’oso pin o Baba rere, Baba maa so mi o t’omo t’omo, Ohun ti yi’oo pamilekun o l’Odun titun, maa jeko sele si mi o Baba rere. It translates to “The year is coming to an end, Good God, watch over me and my children, whatever will make me cry in the new year, do not let it happen to me good God.” Although the song was released in 1979, it is still played at the end of every year in Nigeria and by those in diaspora.
These two songs underscore the desire of every human from all over the world and from time past that whenever a year is coming to an end and a new one is being birthed, there is an acknowledgement that undesirable things happen but our heart pleads with our heavenly Father to spare us from lives’ troubles. It’s inevitable that troubles will come in this world but we want only the good. Therefore, it’s unsurprising that we plead with a superior being to keep us from life’s troubles.
When you live and breathe in Nigeria, you wonder how troubles can be far away. There is the motor cycle taxi popularly known as Okada driver weaving dangerously in and out of traffic as if he has nine lives. There is also the ubiquitous tricycle taxi (aka Keke) equally dangerous and the driver and its co-keke drivers are ready to pounce on any law-abiding car driver that challenges their rough driving in a fit of road rage.
Let’s leave the road rage and move on to the fuel subsidy; The yet to be seen benefits but the seen increases in prices of food from tomatoes to rice and fresh fruits. And if you live in Abuja but you have your family based in the southern or northern parts of Nigeria, you have to think of the cost of an airline flight ticket for the first leg of your journey. You could take the road but that too is costly, financially, considering the fear factor of your own security.
And because the holidays are not a respecter of school fees, your children resume school in the New Year and then you have to find the elusive amount of money for their school fees. Of Course! If your family lives abroad, you have to calculate and re calculate and perhaps buy your ticket from outside Nigeria because it’s cheaper that way. If you have a job, your salary might not have increased but the spending capacity has diminished. Grossly so. Then you think of your children or grandchildren, your job and if you’ve retired, you wonder about that pension.
If you have been attending to everything and everyone around you but skimping on your own health, you might suddenly have that non-negotiable health scare that you just have to attend too. All of a sudden, you’re faced with the dilemma of choosing between your health and paying your bills or part of it.
So, if you live and breathe in Nigeria, and for the past one year, you have not been sick or hospitalised, then consider yourself richly blessed compared to someone who earns a 7-digit salary and spends 99.9 per cent of that money on ill health. If you’re reading this, then you and several billions of people have made it into 2024 despite all the ups and downs. That, dear reader is a blessing. Congratulations! It is not a small blessing. To be in Nigeria at this time is not for the faint-hearted.
The year 2024 is already here. All the anticipations, the resolutions, the predictions of last year were perhaps not met and yet again, we have piled more expectations for this year which is not a bad thing in itself. However, it becomes bad when the desires are unmet, the disappointment in the state of affairs of the nation or perhaps in your family or in relations that are near or far-flung thousands of miles away. It becomes distressing when it begins to affect the state of our mental health.
This 2024, let us love ourselves, our own mental state of health above all the frays in the country and in our relationships. If you turn on the radio or television, your ears (or eyes if you’re reading the news) are awash with news of wars, kidnappings, political turmoil, food insecurities, savagery, corruption, social injustice, drug wars and religious wranglings. Except we live in a utopian society these unpleasant events will be in the news.
However, if we continue to listen, think and chew on the events in the news, it can and will affect our mental health. So, what do we do?
First, we love our individual selves and mindfully determine that nothing we hear about events around us will interfere with our state of mind. Sometimes, we might need to repeat this to ourselves every day. If you are the type of person that carries anything you hear from the news in your head, you need to stop. You need to have many imaginary, leaking pockets that allows all the bad news to seep through. Perhaps, every now and then you should stop listening to the distressing news.
Second, be kind to others around you. You don’t always have to spend money to be kind. Simply, greeting that neighbour and sincerely waiting for his/her response to, “how are you today?” and exchanging a genuine smile might be all it takes to prevent your neighbour’s mental health breakdown.
Third, before we go outside, have we showed kindness or gratitude to those living with us; be it children, grandchildren, siblings, parents or our spouses? We should not be encumbered by the dregs of daily living and forget those closest to us. Even the gateman/gatewoman. We should also be careful for those we hold with unforgiveness in our hearts. Yes, we may be right and they may be wrong but at the end of the day, what toll is it taking on your mental health?
Sometimes, for our own health and sanity, we just need to let go of unforgiveness. We show we are of a greater mind when we forgive completely and let go of all the hurts and the pains. By doing so we are restoring our own mental health. And if you’re the one in the wrong, it’s time to admit you were wrong, seek forgiveness and move on.
And then after forgiveness, you can perhaps if it’s possible and it usually is in this digital age have a reconciliation. During the COVID-19 era, some people had Zoom parties. Further, as part of taking charge of your mental health, get yourself something nice. You might be the one that celebrates your spouse’s birthday and the children and other relatives but when it comes to your own birthday, you just do nothing and if nobody remembers you on your birthday, you feel sad.
No! Tell them it’s your birthday. Don’t brood. Don’t hold that against them. Some people just forget, especially with aging and the hustle and bustle of life. Go out and get yourself something nice. Buy yourself a gift. All these actions will help keep you in a good state of mental health.
In Charles Dicken’s “Great Expectations”, the protagonist placed his hopes on the wrong person not knowing that the person he least expected would be his helper. In this year, let us sow seeds of kindness and help those in need. It could be as simple as offering them water to drink and anything else within our power. Those seeds of kindness come back in ways we least expect.
So, in this year 2024, let us not be bugged down by the happenings around us. Yes. Life happens but we should hold our mental state of health more important than the events happening around us. It’s not that you’re in denial but you must value your own state of health above others. Afterall, no one is indispensable.
As the evergreen Chief Commander Ebenezer Obey sang, Awon to jaiye lana da? Won ti ku, won ti lo. (Those who enjoyed lives in years past, where are they? They have died and are gone.) We should make the best of 2024 for ourselves and our mental state of health. Happy 2024!
Professor Obilade wrote from Nile University, Abuja.
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